?How May Chemistry with Others Develop

 Chemistry.  Either it is there or it is not.

However, many theories out there argue that chemistry-making with others may be taught.  The point with chemistry is, either it is there or it is not.

It is all because chemistry is an energetic reaction.  It may literally be felt in certain body parts, sensations, feelings, through a thinking system, which works more effectively.

Chemistry may occur with almost every friend, situation, a home, an idea, even with a new thought that came to mind:  Either the chemistry is there or it just doesn't work out.

Chemistry may be contained, loved, connected.

There is some truth to the view stating that chemistry may be created, since the more an individual progresses in terms of personal development and spiritual growth, he will leave behind the judgment and criticism in favor of compassion and empathy.  Thus, one may be able to stand in others' shoes, allowing them, in turn, to experience a greater degree of trust toward you, as well as a feeling of intimacy.  Consequently, the connection-making will become easier.

Natural leaders may contain more people.  They understand, both intellectually and mentally, that there are many types of people, accepting the individual differences.  They are the ones who are able to contain more complex, or different individuals, understanding where they come from.  They create chemistry more easily, with many more people.

True spirituality is exactly about that, namely, accepting others; understanding who you are, thereby putting all pieces together.

Is negative chemistry possible?  Yes.

Example No. 1

Various magic methods and cults, which have unfortunately multiplied in number in recent years, supposedly offer a fulfillment of most basic, essential human needs.  In practice, they do not provide a true solution, but rather, a pseudo-solution.  Thus, when such individuals experience pain and distress, not knowing where the most suitable, healthiest solution for them may be found, they will choose to approach those magic-peddlers.  Because of their dismal situation, they confuse hope for chemistry.

Example No. 2

If a certain issue causes you great frustration stemming from something that lacks, such as finding a spouse, in practice, you are so frantic and desperate, that you confuse the desire to become involved with somebody with chemistry, disproportionately exaggerating the candidate's quality and compatibility.

You are in such a rush to find the right person, that any reasonable judgment and common sense fade away and you induce justification and faith that you experience great chemistry with that person.

Example No. 3

Skillful salesperson may create pseudo-chemistry as well.  They put you in a "sales bubble" where they will dominate you once they notice any strong lack or need, which will not be truly fulfilled by their product.

Following the sale process, you are likely to feel cheated.

Good chemistry is a wonderful sensation, involving the experience that you understand each other, with no feeling of estrangement, but familiarity.  The body movements and gestures are open and free.  One will not experience the desire to flee, but experience interest and curiosity, with no effort, since everything feels so natural and right.

Those who easily induce and experience chemistry possess charisma.

Chemistry, however, may also be formed with your person of choice, idea, or thought.

Remember:  One may experience healthy chemistry only in a balanced state of mind.  Good chemistry is a good barometer!  It allows an individual to explore his or her connections with his surroundings.  There may be a time when this exploration will be easier than in other times, and that is perfectly fine, too.

Ways to induce chemistry and fine-tune that wonderful ability

  1. Initiating interaction – with more co-workers, in college, or at school.
  2. Take more interested in random people whom you meet at the store, the supermarket, or while waiting in line.  You will not believe how quickly people react if they identify someone whose chemistry is positive.
  3. Group Interaction:  Theater workshops, volunteering for non-profit organizations, involvement in forums.
  4. Spending some time together – Spend more quality time with everyone.  If you wish to get old with somebody, you should show how much you love spending time with him/her.  Date for a longer stretch of time, as it will facilitate a better mutual understanding and relationship development.
  5. If you are trying to build up chemistry with your Lady of Dreams, make a gesture such as covering her with your jacket when she is cold.  Those are simple steps, but may induce a feeling of "coziness", immediately arousing feelings of affection, warmth, and desire for closeness.

Self-Test Questionnaire

  • Do you easily form chemistry with strangers?
  • With what types do you find it easier to form chemistry?
  • With what types you experience no chemistry at all?
  • With what types do you form negative chemistry, which results in resentment?


It is likely that those you marked as positive chemistry partners are those similar to you, and with whom, naturally, you will feel comfortable.

Those of whom you are indifferent, who arouse nothing in you, neither strength nor weakness, are of no interest or focus.

However, those who drive you up the wall are worth the attention!

This is the most important group.  If the individuals in it arouse your resistance, resentment or hard feelings, they are worthy are worthy of a more thorough exploration.

May I learn something of that resistance?  Is there some weakness in me which I have not come to terms with yet?  Have I identified something I do not like?  Is that some warning sign?  Is it worth re-exploring my views, attempting to regulate the chemistry again?  And so on.

Chemistry is an awesome tool for self-introspection and investigation in various occasions.  Learn to apply it properly.


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